Elle Quine, Episode 5

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Elle Quine, Episode five

I follow him outside, towards the ear-splitting sound of the siren.  A group of men, clutching rifles,  ran past us, heading towards the perimeter fence.  Tom watched them, unable to keep a look of worry from his face, and I watched him, feeling anxious.
“Hoi, Private!” he barks out, catching the attention of the nearest man, “What’s the alarm for?”
“South perimeter patrol hasn’t reported back, sir!” the young man tells him, saluting quickly.
“Damn it!”  Tom exclaims, “How long have they been missing?”
“They should have reported in 20 minutes ago, Wing Commander,”
“Alright, on you go!” Tom dismisses the Private while looking pensive.  As the group takes off again, he stands there, muttering a little under his breath before suddenly spinning on his heel and heading off in the opposite direction to that group of armed men.
“Where are you going?” I demand, more to make him remember that I’m here than anything else.
“The other end of the patrol route.  Hopefully we can pick up a trail or something,”
“Alright,”  I say, sighing inwardly.
Tom covers the ground fast, making me wish for my broomstick.  I’m fit and strong, I have to be in this job, but something is driving Tom forward with a fair amount of urgency.  I suppose I might have to revise my opinions a bit, he really does seem to care about this mess.  I’m still pretty sure he doesn’t realise just how fucked up this could get.
Suddenly he holds up his fist, making me stop dead in my tracks as I watch him creep very slowly forward.  There’s trees inside the perimeter fence here, and he is moving as carefully as he can around them to get a clearer view of whatever it is he’s spotted up ahead.  After a few seconds he glances back at me and beckons me forward.  The patch of trees we’re in is right against the perimeter fence.  Maybe ten steps away from where I am crouching with Tom the steel fence has been ripped wide open and is smeared and splattered with blood.  Leading in the opposite direction from us back into the base is a recently trampled and similarly bloodied track through the trees, and the trail plunges on into the forest on the other side of the torn fence.
“I think we can guess what happened to your patrol,” I tell him, grimacing wryly.  I take every death pretty personally since the way I see it, my job is to stop these kind of deaths happening.
“We have to find out if they are still alive,” Tom whispers harshly back at me, and I’m starting to remember part of the reason I find this man so fucking dangerous.  He really does care about saving the lives of his men.  He cares, even though he’s been given a stupidly difficult job by an obtuse and deeply sceptical organisation, and the depth of that caring strikes a chord with me.  I do my job to save people’s lives.  I hate all the politics surrounding my job, hate the way witches carry on like prissy little cats trying to outwit and outstare each other whenever there’s more than a few of us in the room together.  That’s why I hate covens, because they make a great show of being a family and being harmonious on the outside, but on the inside there’s always someone plotting to step into the coven leaders shoes.
While I’m standing having that pointless argument with myself in my head and reminding myself why I should never work with a man I find distracting, Tom has already climbed through the rip in the fence and is gesturing at me to hurry up and follow him.  I’m a better tracker than he is, and I know my magical beasties far better.  With a murmur under my breath I raise myself just the barest inch off of the ground, allowing me to move quickly, silently and without disturbing the trail.  I can keep this up for a good 20 minutes or so, and judging by the still vivid colour of the blood on the ground, our quarry probably aren’t 20 minutes away.
“Stay close and try not to stand on the trail!” I tell him.  This time, I’m leaving him lagging behind, as I weave my way along the careless trail of the Cu Sith.  Suddenly, a little way ahead of us through the trees, I hear a moan. I stop and go still, letting the sounds and the smells of the forest fill me up, and after a moment I know I can smell blood and rot, and the musky, strangely green scent of Cu Sith.
“There’s a man alive in there,” Tom hisses back over his shoulder at me as I stop him going any closer with a touch.  I shake my head slowly, and gesture silently that the pack are only a few feet ahead of us.  Then, unmistakably coming towards us, was the crash of something large, confident and heavy bullying its way through the low branches.  It rounded a tree before we had a chance to turn and run, saw us and lifted its mossy green head up to the sky and let out a howl that curdled my blood.

The House at the End of the Street

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Starring: Jennifer Lawrence, Elisabeth Shue, Max Thieriot

Tagline: “Fear reaches out… for the girl next door.”

Rating: 15 bit of violence and a bit scary

Plot: Recently divorced Sarah (Elizabeth Shue) is looking for a fresh start with her daughter Elissa (Jennifer Lawrence) moves into the house of her dreams in a nice neighbourhood. There is only one problem. The only reason she can afford it is because of the house next door. It is the infamous murder house, where local girl murdered both her parents and supposedly drowned. Rumour has it that she can be seen lurking in the woods. Elissa meets Ryan (max Thieriot) the son of the murdered family, who still lives alone in the house. As Elissa gets closer to Ryan, Sarah becomes more concerned for her daughter. Is there something sinister still in the house?

Why see this? I’d highly recommend this as it is a well acted and enjoyable piece of cinema. I wont say anymore though as I don’t wish to give away any spoilers.

L&Q rating: 8/10

By Lassies, Mags Hart

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Looper

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Looper

Starring:  Joseph Gordon Levitt, Bruce Willis, Emily Blunt, Jeff Daniels, Paul Dano, Piper Perabo
Tagline: “This Generations Matrix”

Rating: 15 fairly violent

Plot: Set in America in the year 2044. Economic collapse has caused severe social decay and the growth of organized crime. Along with this 10% of the population has developed telekinetic powers. In 2074 time travel has been invented, but outlawed. With the introduction of tracking technology, the disposal of bodies secretly is almost impossible. So cunningly crime bosses have access to illegal time travel machines to send people they want ‘taken care of’ to 2044 where they are duly shuffled off the mortal coil by Loopers with blunderbuses. The loopers are contract killers and receive payment in silver bars strapped to the people they kill. When bosses wish to terminate a Looper’s contract the send back their future self to be killed and the first they know of it is when there are gold bars instead of silver strapped to the victim. This is known as ‘closing the loop’. Unfortunately for Joe when his future self is sent back he is more than ready for him and escapes. This means that present Joe is in deep do do with his crime bosses and must hunt down his future self. The future self is off in search of ‘the rainmaker’ who is a child in 2044 but in 2074 he is a vicious crime boss responsible for closing all the loopers..loops.

Why see this? Well I hate to be a Looper Pooper but this film is waay over hyped. Can’t complain about the performances put in, and Joseph Gordon Levitt does seem to have Bruce Willis’ mannerisms down. There is one scene I found deeply troubling but I shant say any more. That aside none of the characters are actually likeable, so there isn’t really anyone you want to root for, even the usually brilliant Emily Blunt. Again this is an ok film, but please do not place your expectations too high because this film will fall short.

L&Q rating: 7/10

By Lassie, Mags Hart

Dredd 3D

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Dredd 3D

Starring: Karl Urban, Lena Headey, Olivia Thrilby, Deobia Oparei
Tagline: “Judgment is Coming”

Rating: 18 – some serious violence

Plot: Set in the future, the world is an irradiated wasteland, known as the cursed earth. Only a few mega cities house the world’s population. Mega-City One houses hundreds of millions of people and it’s a crime ridden cesspit. The law is administered by Judges from the halls of justice; they are the Judge, the Jury and the Executioner. Judge Dredd (Karl Urban) is the most feared of the Judges with his uncompromising and remorseless nature. Dredd is tasked with evaluating psychic rookie Judge Anderson (Olivia Thrilby) and he instructs her to pick which of the many crimes committed to investigate. She picks a triple murder at the notorious 200-story slum tower block Peach Trees. Unfortunately for them that block is controlled by the viscous drug lord Ma-Ma (Lena Headey). The judges soon discover that the block is the source of the narcotic Slo-Mo, a highly addictive drug which seemingly slows down the passage of time to 1% of normal speed. While investigating the murders the Judges take one of Ma-Ma’s top henchmen into custody. Fearing what secrets will be revealed during interrogation Ma-Ma has the tower block shut down and orders the death of the two judges. Outnumbered and with no one coming in to the rescue the two judges are forced into a battle of survival.

Why see this? Well if you are a fan of Judge Dredd, but thought Sly Stallone’s effort was too cartoony and not violent enough, go see it.. If you are a fan of CGI flicks that rely on being action/ CGI heavy while being plot light (it is a well shot film and is quite beautiful to behold in 3D), go see it. If you are looking for 95mins of mindless entertainment, go see it. Don’t expect this to be Oscar worthy but appreciate it for what it is. Full of violence, drugs, big guns and a very dark view of our possible future. While it isn’t the best film I’ve seen I did very much enjoy it. Karl Urban was a good Dredd and Lena Heady is a fabulous actress who can make you utterly despise her but still kind of want her to be your friend.

L&Q rating: 7/10

Review by Lassie, Mags Hart

Lawless Review

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Lawless

Starring: Tom Hardy, Shia LaBeof, Gary Oldman, Guy Pearce, Jessica Chastain Jason Clarke and Mia Wasikowska.
Tagline: “When the law becomes corrupt, outlaws became heroes
Rating: 18 – some serious violence
Plot: Set during Prohibition-Era America in Franklin County, Virginia (dubbed the wettest county in the world) and following the lives of bootlegging brothers Bondurant. Forrest (Tom Hardy), Howard (Jason Clarke) and Jack (Shia LaBeouf). The Bondurant’s are said to be invincible, especially Forrest, as the film goes on the legend grows. The Bondurant’s run a very profitable and popular moonshine business. As is the way of things they keep the local law enforcement happy by paying them off with booze. All is well until the arrival of Special Deputy Charley Rakes (Guy Pearce) He informs them that a sizeable financial kickback will be required if they are to be allowed to continue to distribute their hooch. Naturally Forrest refuses and threatens Rakes. Speaking to the other bootleggers, Forrest convinces them to tell Rakes where to go. Eventually though the others capitulate due to Rakes intimidation. After that you will see some truly horrifically violent scenes and you will utterly despise Guy Pearce. Gary Oldman is his usual wonderful self, though criminally underused. I will confess I was very upset at a few parts and in tears so I would recommend tissues for any Ladies or Quines that are of an emotion disposition.

Why see this?: Two words – Tom Hardy! Even though he is wearing a cardigan for most of the film he is still unbelievably hot and I swear he could act using only his eyes and making a series of grunts! However, if that isn’t enough reason to see it, then go for the fantastic screenplay by Nick Cave based on the true story as recounted by Matt Bondurant in ‘The Wettest County in the World’ This is one of the best, if not the best film released this year. Unlike all the CGI flicks that relies on being action/ CGI heavy while being plot light, Lawless is a real, gritty, extremely violent and brilliantly acted film.
L&Q rating: 10/10

Review by Lassie, Mags Hart

Elle Quine, Episode 4

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Episode four

I threw the dossier on Tom’s desk and perched myself on the edge of it, turning to face him with my arms folded.  He threw his jacket over the back of his chair and slumped into his seat, looking exhausted.
“So, spill it,” I tell him, impatient now to find out what is going on.
“You’ve read the dossier?” he asks me, and I sigh.
“It’s more about the men who disappeared than any sightings or evidence.  There’s practically fuck all in there,” I tell him with disdain.  I hate all the secrecy crap that comes with dealing with the MoD.
“You’re going to be pretty pissed off,” he tells me, looking me in the eye with the first serious look I’ve seen today on his face.  My stomach sinks.
“Something escaped?” I ask him, feeling cynicism rise like bile inside me.  I am not appeased by the look he gives me.  ”Some things escaped?” I try again, upping the stakes a little. He has the grace to give an embarrassed cough.
“Yes, some things.  I know you warned me about it, but at least we’re reasonably remote out here,” He explains while I give him my coldest, hardest stare.
“Remote?  There’s villages all around here!  Do you even know what the hunting range of a Cu Sith is?  Any idea what a pack of them can do?”  I demand, furious now.  This is not good news.  It does explain the fact that everything seems to be dying around the base though;  Cu Sith are harbingers of death, amongst other things.
“I guess saying I’m sorry isn’t going to cut it?” I’m surprised he has the gall to ask.
“Good guess!” I tell him flatly, “Your people have no idea what they are meddling with!”  I’m furious, and I have every right to be.  The last time I worked with Tom I made it very plain to him and his boss that they would end up with a bad situation on their hands if they didn’t bring some witches in to help them.
“I know, Elle, and I’ve tried to enlighten them but there is just so much red tape and bullshit to wade through,” he tells me now.  I growl in my throat and jump to my feet so I can pace the floor.
“You’ve had 6 men disappear.  Have there been any disappearances locally.  Any women?” I ask him.  He gives me a quizzical look.
“I was told it was Cu Sith.  They are known to steal women,” I explain with exasperation, “I would have thought at least you would have taken the time to know this stuff!”
“It’s MoD policy not to get involved in local matters,” he says, but he looks sheepish about it.
“Of course it is,” I spit out, then I finally round on him, venting all my anger, “Just exactly how fucked up have you allowed this situation to get?”
“It was fine until about a month ago, we had them all well under control, but they are a lot cleverer than ordinary dogs,” he begins hesitantly.
“I could have told you that.  Any witch could have told you that, ” I growl.
“I tried to get the Ministry to recruit someone, but they weren’t for it at all,” he replies, trying to placate me.  I shrug and gesture at him to continue.
“The first one escaped and it took two men the night it got out, while they were out searching for it.  The second got out a couple of days later, then after a week the rest escaped.  I watched the camera footage, the first two came back for the rest,”
“How many?” I ask with a sigh.
“Five,”
“And they’ve been loose as a pack for about three weeks?”
“Yep,” he tells me, sounding pretty subdued.
I stare at him, then pick the dossier back up and flick through it, staring at  the faces of the missing men.  6  men over four weeks between 5 Cu Sith.  It’s almost enough, by my reckoning, and I get a brief flare of hope that no civilians have been endangered by this massive fuck up.  The hope doesn’t last long, of course, 6 is only almost enough after all, and besides, catching and killing men is one of the least troubling things these beasties can do.  What I’m really worried about is what these dogs could be doing with the local women folk.
“Well, I guess first we go see if there are any missing persons at the local police station, and then we figure out where they have made their den,” I tell him, deciding the only way forward is action.
“We haven’t found a trace of it,” Tom tells me flatly, and I can hear every hour of lost sleep his had over it in the desperate tone of his voice.
“Of course not, because although they might be dogs, they are still fairy dogs!” I tell him with no small measure of exasperation.  He’s got a question on his lips immediately, but a screaming klaxon of an alarm splits the air and we both kind of jump to our feet, leaving that question unasked.
“What the hell is that for?” I ask, shouting over the noise to make myself heard.
“It’s the camp security alarm.  Something has breached the perimeter,” He says, shrugging his jacket on and heading for the door.  I start to follow him.
“Stay here, this might have nothing to do with the dogs,” he tries to tell me, but I give him a hard stare.
“If it isn’t then I’ll just head into town,” I reply,  with a shrug, “and if it is, you won’t have to waste any time sending for me,”
He gives me a nod, and I see in those dark eyes of his that he is actually pretty anxious about what is going on.  For the first time  in a long time, I start to feel sorry for him.  I find myself hoping I don’t regret it.

Veeloo’s Oatcakes

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Today’s recipe is for Poppy, Pecorino Romano & Cumin Oatcakes. 

Put oven on 180 deg. & boil the kettle. Measure into a bowl 150g of medium oatmeal & 150g of standard type oats. Salt & pepper to taste. 75g of oil (I used olive oil today, but ricebran, rapeseed etc will do just fine) 1 tblsp cumin & 1 fistful (2tblsp?)poppy seeds about 1/3rd of a block of pecorino romano. Make a hole in centre of dry ingredients. Add oil & stir until well mixed. Add water up to about 150ml, to bind it- looks like a thick lump of goo …not dropping consistency…just add more oatmeal if its too runny. Mix thoroughly then walk away & check fb & twitter timelines. After 10 minutes or so you can go back & shape your dough into individual biscuits.

The posh way would be to flour your board & roll it out then cut neatly with cutter. What a faff! Just pull some out of the bowl, quickly roll into your hand about a golf ball size then lay it on board & thump with fist, form it into a circle or whatever shape to about 5mm thickness. Fill up your baking tray. 25 mins on one side, turn over & another 5 mins or so. they should be biscuity when done not squidgy. Leave to cool on wire rack. They store for up to a week in an airtight container (they never last that long)

Feel free to add pumpkin or sunflower seeds (a fistful should suffice) for a change.

When you get used to messing with this…you tend to ignore standard measurements & do it by instinct…I over compensated by using more oatmeal than usual, because of my hunger so have got around 30 to chomp thru this week!

Mushroom pate, huumus or cream cheese are good toppers.”